by JC PORTIS
What’s happening folks? JC here for Tystenac’s Dragon Fire Music Reviews! This week Ian Holbrook asked me to review “Only” by Wannabe Barbie, Jimmy Brooks, Lil Wayne, and Michael Jackson clone 538.
Why did I give everyone a designated name based on a part of their personality or career other than Wayne? Well, Lil Wayne is at a point in his career where he could rap over a garbage disposal and someone would buy it. That’s not insulting his skills as a rapper, that’s just saying he’s done everything, so there’s no reason to even take a stab at him. The other three? I could go on about all day. However, that’s not what this is about. The song itself is what I am reviewing.
Once the intro begins, you almost become entranced in it. The specific tones in the song (almost like a pitched-up version of the Jeopardy music) just lure you into thinking, “okay, this might be a decent song.” Then what happens, you may ask? The opening line begins: “I never [expletive] Wayne I never [expletive] Drake.” From there on out, you just know this song is lyrically dead. Nicki continues to spit about how if she did have sex with the two men, she’d want them to like cupcakes. And I’m not talking about the perfect cupcakes that your classmates would bring to class on their birthdays in grade school, folks. After that, she makes a lot of sexual innuendos and doesn’t think we’d get her duct tape metaphor.
As her verse ends, we are greeted by everyone’s favorite black pop singer Jason – oops, I mean Chris Brown. Sorry, they all sound the same after a while. He tells us that if we are not real, bad, independent, rich, a boss, or thick, we mean nothing. This chorus comes out of nowhere, and I don’t respect it at all. It’s not even remotely close to what Chris Brown is known for. He basically says, “I’ll get money regardless, so who cares?”
The rapper Drake (who almost peaked my interest) attempts to put a verse together that literally. says he wants an overweight woman so he can have sex with her. Yup. Drake, I preferred you as an actor. Lil Wayne has a verse, but like I said, I have no way to say anything about him when it doesn’t matter. There was a time where I’d be more critical of Wayne, but now that he has proven that there is no altering his style. All his music will ever be about is weed, money, and women galore.
The overall tune of the song (the high pitched, mesmerizing part of the song) is addictive, but it is not addictive enough to excuse the fact that I hear the lyrics and immediately want to turn the song off. The beat is low and is overwhelmed by the tune. The production itself has no musical changes other than an added drum after the first 8 bars of each verse. There is nothing desirable about this song unless you’re a die hard Young Money fan and need it in your life.
Honestly, every time I hear this song, all I can think is “Bruh what was that?” Besides the constant tune of the song, this is nothing but money wasted by the artists, producers, and fans. “Tap Out” is a better song with the same topic and artists (minus Drake, who is replaced by Future). It’s the similar song about sex and money but with a beat that almost makes me want to listen.
Thanks for reading, folks! Don’t forget to tweet @TUTystenac using #DFJC with requests for my next review. Have a nice week!
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